I spent most of my twenties living by a process of elimination. I didn’t know what kind of career I wanted so I hopped from job to job, whittling down those careers I didn’t want in the hopes that this process would make it easier to figure out what I did want. I had no desire to get married and settle down, and I wandered through life with no goals, no concrete plans, hoping that something would inspire me. It was messy, but it was also oddly honest.

Everyone around me seemed to be moving forward, getting married, landing good jobs with benefits and 401K plans, buying new cars, and eventually buying homes. They were settling into grown-up life while I kept changing careers and apartments every year, if not every few months. On the one hand, I was jealous and wished I wanted the normal path. On the other, I was fascinated by exotic strangers and the excitement they seemed to carry. Their lives looked less polished but far more alive.

I’m sharing all of this because I think it’s valuable to feel the uncertainty of life. It’s okay to not know what you want, who you want, or where you want to be. Organization isn’t all it’s cracked up to be, and our goals only take us so far. There will be detours and derailments, and that is okay. The aimless journey is wide open, which is terrifying and thrilling at the same time. Sometimes that openness is exactly what makes room for change.

If I hadn’t been aimless, I wouldn’t have gotten to work in L.A. in the entertainment industry, gone hang-gliding in New Zealand, or met the charismatic Ecuadorian who taught me how to really dance. Life is messy, and it is supposed to be. The messiness is where the real lessons lie, and it is where inspiration comes from. So be aimless for a little while, because when you stop trying to plan every move, you make room for surprises.